Sunday, October 17, 2004

Perfect storm

So lately, I've been feeling a bit down. It's probably apparent in my postings.

I've decided that it's a combination of the following:

- Dearth of close friends within daily/easy access
- NYC (a very lonely city at times, especially if you didn't grow up here and don't have an established safety net)
- A somewhat sucky job (admittedly, I took this job with the understanding that it wouldn't be glamourous or exciting - but mainly to pay the bills and get away from my last job which was exciting, and meaningful, but the work environment was terrible)
- A lot of free time (partly as a result of this sucky job, strange, because I thought that was what I wanted - more free time, but I don't have anything to fill it up with, yet)
- Uncertainty about the future, and/or what I want the future to look like

All of this turns out to be the perfect storm, resulting in an extreme feeling of isolation and being lost.

No wonder there are so many crazy people in NYC, it kind of does that to you if you're not careful, especially if you don't have some sort of community (church/temple, school, etc).

This leads me to believe in the benefits of a small town, small community. I think that fits me to a T.

No comments: